Finally, the night before my last treatment! To say I am excited is an understatement. Of course the anxiousness sets in when I'm trying to sleep. All I can think about is how the pains of tomorrow will be the last ones. It's the greatest feeling in the world.
My life is so much different than it was 6 months ago. I see things now, I mean really see them. The sky looks different, the trees look greener and more alive, and little things that went unnoticed are now things that make me smile everyday. I am so grateful for this entire battle. Of course I didn't enjoy a lot of it, but the outcome is something I'll carry with me forever. An appreciation for life and the desire to be the best version of myself! That makes every bump, bruise, and pain worth it.
I have a pretty big week ahead of me. I have chemo on Monday, port removal surgery is Tuesday, then some healing time, and eventually I'll be making my way to my summer camp job. Looking forward to camp has kept me pushing through this whole thing. Having something to work towards kept me motivated. I cannot wait to start working out again and to feel myself getting stronger. I can't wait to have my brain back.. And my hair! I know all of these things will take time, but I'm pretty sure I can handle that!
I was driving around the other day and noticing my surroundings. I was just thinking about how much different things look now than they did before. I swear the sky has never looked as beautiful to me. As I was driving and processing this my next thought was: "I really did this." I started to cry. I was just overwhelmed by this sense of pride and victory. I beat cancer! I took this ugly situation and made it my own.. I never let cancer control me. I did it! I beat the toughest opponent I hope to ever face and I did it all while being me. I laughed, I cried, and I fought like hell to finish this game. With a buzzed head and braces I have never been more confident in myself. You want to mess with me?! I dare you. I beat cancer, there's no way you can knock me down. You know in a way I feel like a bad ass. I feel like I can take on the world and I'm ready to. I still expect some more bumps along the way, but I say bring it on.
My journey may be nearing it's end, but my blog won't be. I still have a few things left to say! Listen for that bell tomorrow... I plan on ringing it pretty loud.